tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5515169432627108442024-03-05T20:12:34.408-07:00a (silver)Charmed lifeA 28 year old, single and childless wannabe wifey and mommy living her life the best way she knows how...Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-77955388909213094192012-09-20T18:48:00.002-06:002012-09-20T18:49:13.223-06:00Blogging ItchHowdy!!<br />
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It's been a while since I've blogged, I know. Life has been crazy busy... and I was out of touch with myself for a while. Before school started in August, negativity and stress were getting the best of me. I was feeling down and out (and definitely out of sorts) about being in a position in life that I wasn't particularly proud of. I was working a job that I loved but wasn't particularly in love with because of the lack of future in it for me.<br />
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If you don't know me very well, I'll catch you up a bit... I was working in a tattoo shop. I had gotten the wild hair to get myself in the tattoo industry in any way possibly and thought piercing might be the way to go. It was only going to be a fun job, which it was, but sometime during my employment, I decided that piercing was not the route I wanted to go in, professionally. I LOVE everything about body modification, but piercing was not my passion. Photography and anything medical/science/math related are.<br />
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I loved everything about that job! It took a good 3 or 4 months to finally feel like I belonged there and to find my groove, but when I did, I settled right in! The people I worked with were awesome, even if they were hard to deal with sometimes, but who isn't when you work so closely with people for so long, considering there aren't shifts you work but rather whole days. Not a bad gig, in all honesty, and we were by loose definitions a family.<br />
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As of this last Sunday, my employment with the company ceased unexpectedly. I was sad, and I'm still a little sad, but it's for the best. Because I started a medical assisting program (and had been devising a way to get into the medical field for years but putting it off for other things I felt like doing instead because they were more fun and easy), I knew the time would come eventually. It was inevitable that I would leave, I just wasn't prepared for it to be so soon.<br />
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And now, I'm actually happily unemployed!! I've been going pretty much non-stop since I started school, with the exception of one Saturday and Labor Day off to putz around and do nothing... and now, I'll have TWO WHOLE DAYS to do just that! Maybe I'll actually get some regular sleep!! hahaha!!<br />
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So, now that I can now focus soley on school, medical, and my future career and plans, I feel so much more like myself... and I'm getting in touch with things I've wanted for my life that I buried a long time ago because I got comfortable. I hate to admit that I've put so much I wanted in life on hold for other people (essentially), because I don't want to separate myself from the people I love the most, but it's gotten to a point that I don't want to put what I really want on hold anymore. I want to go to the University of Florida, I want to work at Shands at UF, and if I don't capitalize on these desires now, while I don't have kids or a husband, I'll regret it for the rest of my life.<br />
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Anyway, so that's what's going on with me. I felt like I was putting too much of myself up on <a href="http://www.twitter.com/silvercharmer" target="_blank">Twitter</a>, and I probably was, I want to start putting it all back on here. I know I keep saying this, but I just spent the last couple hours browsing blogs (like <a href="http://www.thedaintysquid.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">The Dainty Squid</a>) and realizing how much I miss putting together my thoughts and chronicling my life. I used to take oodles of pictures with my cameras and now I hardly do any of it...<br />
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So, Fridays, look for updates from school! I think Fridays, I'll start putting together summary blogs about my adventures in school with all the girls I'm learning with! We started <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phlebotomy" target="_blank">phlebotomy</a> in school this week, and just yesterday, we started drawing blood! I didn't draw or get poked (other than finger pricks) because I wasn't feeling too kosher in the tummy area (I ate greasy food for lunch that day), but once that happens, look out for updates!<br />
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Follow me on <a href="http://www.twitter.com/silvercharmer" target="_blank">Twitter</a> and <a href="http://web.stagram.com/n/silvercharmer/" target="_blank">Instagram</a>!<br />
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Anyway, that's all for now!<br />
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Muchos Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-20621030998312519232012-08-20T18:54:00.003-06:002012-08-20T18:54:27.731-06:00Monday. FUNday... to me...<br />
I suppose I should update.<br />
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So, deactivated my FB again, after re-activating it and letting people know why I disappeared, and give them the opportunity to take my number if they didn't have it already.<br />
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Best thing I've ever done. Never looking back. I never thought getting rid of FB would be so liberating. It's just a stupid social networking site, but it feel better. I feel like I dropped dead weight.<br />
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Anyway, I started a medical assisting program almost 2 weeks ago and I'm loving it! I'm much more prepared for it than I thought I would be! I was told by my adviser that I was going to be stressed out and frantic over learning this stuff, but quite the contrary! The biggest problem, tho, is that I was planning on using this program as a means to turn over bad habits and form better study habits, and I haven't really needed to do much. I wanted to be prepared for going back to finish my Bachelor's degree and I'm not entirely sure I'll get it. Who knows, tho. I lot can happen in the next 6-ish months.<br />
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Anyway, not much else going on with me. Keeping busy with school Monday thru Friday, and working Saturdays and Sundays. SO far, I really like it! I didn't think I'd really enjoy taking my ass to work on the weekend but I love it!! It's like an awesome vacation from the "work" week at school. The girls I'm in class with are pretty cool, but they do a lot of talking/side-conversing while the teacher is leading discussion and I want to bitch slap them. At least I did Friday.<br />
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I couldn't have gotten out of that classroom faster. 5 solid days a week with people can really wear on you, so work came around Saturday and Sunday and it was cake. It really is nice to have a job that you get along with your co-workers, but you never see them outside of work. It's like a nice vacation from "real life."<br />
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And work?? Don't get me started!! I get more and more grateful every day for my job! I mean, what job out there pays someone to hang out at a place they already like to hang out with AND I can go smoke weed in my car if I wanted to.<br />
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Seriously, fucking cake!<br />
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Perks, dude! All about the perks! If you don't love what you're doing, than why bother?!<br />
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Besos!<br />
Aimee<br />
Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-1826289099693995862012-07-15T15:31:00.002-06:002012-07-15T15:31:08.914-06:00CrossroadsMy need for change and my need to move is at an all-time high. It's not that I'm feeling the need to leave something behind. In fact, the idea of leaving Colorado scares and saddens me but I feel like my time here is over. I feel like I've fulfilled my purpose and it's time to move on.<br />
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Last night, I hung out with Mario (my ex from 7 years ago and my first true love). It was really good to see him but sitting in his presence, I could see what my life could (or would) look like if I were to give in to my desire to be with him. It's not bad. In fact, it was rather beautiful in a simplistic way and it makes me so sad that I don't want that... and I could so easily just let go and be with him. It was hard to stay strong and walk away, but I did.<br />
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It wouldn't have been a bad life, it just wouldn't have been extraordinary. It would have been limited. I wouldn't be my complete and whole self. I would have to suppress certain things about myself in order for that relationship to work to its fullest potential. Sacrifice would be necessary. I want to be there for him and his daughter. I want to make a difference there... but I don't see how doing all of that would benefit me.<br />
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My fullest-expressed self is clawing to get out. Screaming and pleading for me to let go and give in to my fullest and greatest potential. It's uncomfortable and a unsettling because I will no longer recognize myself and my life.<br />
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This crossroads that I'm at is, in one direction, very familiar. Very safe and predictable. Like looking at a picture or watching a movie, I can see clearly what life would look like (or even just really closely resemble) if I were to stay here. <br />
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If I go, I have absolutely no clue what myself or my life would look like. The unknown is scary. I've faced the unknown before and I want to get better at it. I want to know myself as someone who faces the future head-on, never knowing what's going to happen, and, rather than having the urge to turn back and stay where I know things are good but not great, I'd rather know myself as someone who takes all of life's challenges and turns them in to opportunities to display what life can really be about... a life of adventure, thrill, exhilaration, pushing myself beyond the limits of what I thought I was capable of, and trusting God in all of it. Always feeling grateful to be alive.<br />
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So, on-ward I move. I prefer roads less traveled.<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-44013935158288774702012-07-12T10:44:00.000-06:002012-07-12T10:44:04.246-06:00ThursdayI still think about moving daily. I've pretty much settled on Seattle but a lot can change between now and then. As suspected, I'm starting to rethink my leaving Denver. I love Colorado and I really don't want to leave, but my need to experience something new is stronger than my need to stay.<br />
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But, I'm always leaving room for me to change my mind.<br />
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I was driving home yesterday from work, thinking about what life would be like to live in Seattle, and my heart started feeling funny. I feel like that's a right fit, and it's weird considering I've never been there, but I have a feeling this is a right choice.<br />
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More meditating and praying about it will be needed, but I know whatever direction I end up going in, I can make it. I will make it.<br />
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On a side note: I need to start doing more video blogs. Was watching <a href="http://www.twitter.com/itsjudytime" target="_blank">ItsJudyTime's</a> <a href="http://t.co/kJVJ8DWo" target="_blank">vlog</a> from yesterday and it made me want to start vlogging! I want a video recording device! I can always start with my phone, huh?!<br />
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Vlogging will be the next step to sharing myself more.<br />
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Anyway, hope ya'll have an excellent day!<br />
Aimee<br />
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P.S. I forgot! Yesterday was week 36 braces adjustment. I was trying to document my journey with braces but I have a tendency of forgetting (see: this blog). I do have a shot of my teeth! I can't believe how much my mouth has changed!</div>
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The one on the left is the day I came home with my braces on. The two on the right are from yesterday.</div>
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<br />Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-43682114944280185412012-07-08T14:27:00.004-06:002012-07-08T14:30:25.612-06:00Sunday FundayMy restlessness has subsided a little bit. I'm not as anxious about "getting out of here" as I was a few days ago, but it is still there nonetheless.<br />
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I feel a little more clear headed about what direction I want to go in, and although I have a feeling I may, at the last minute, get cold feet, I feel like I need to do this. California may not be the place tho. My mom, earlier today, planted the seed of "Portland" in my brain and told me to do my research. Some of the kids I grew up with are now living in Portland (and have been for a few years now, at least) and are loving it. I think my mom wants me to move in that direction. I've never been there but it sounds intriguing.</div>
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I started a <a href="http://silvercharmer.chipin.com/move-to-california" target="_blank">ChipIn</a> for anyone that wants to help with moving costs. In the meantime, I'm also going to start to sell off some of my own personal belongs, to lighten the load (and my life), and raise some extra funds. If anyone is interested, I'll post a link of where the items can be found for your browsing pleasure. I have a lot to plan for... the idea of moving excites me AND scares the crap out of me.</div>
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I went to a bonfire last night at a friend's house. </div>
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It was originally just a party, but by the end of the night, they decided to move the firepit over to the middle of the backyard and start a fire, so we sat around, drank some beer, cracked jokes, told stories and had a fucking good time. Those are the days I love so much and those are the times I'm going to miss. I love my friends. I love the people that surround me, and the idea of leaving them to go try something new makes me a little sad. They mean so much to me, but I really do feel like I have to separate myself and almost prove to myself what I'm really made of.</div>
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I had mentioned to them that I wanted to move at the beginning of January to California, and my one friend, Bridget (who's house we were at) said that if she wasn't married with kids, she would do the same. And that she kind of did. At 17, she stepped out on her own and never looked back. I never did that. I think, psychologically, I feel like I had a long time ago, physically, I never did. I moved out on my own a few times, but I've never completely cut the cord. I know my parents and family is there for me no matter what, but for fucks sake! I'm 28. As much as I want to get married and have kids one day, I need to know I can completely, 100% take care of myself, and have the proof to show for it. I've been too comfortable. I need to put myself in an uncomfortable situation, to test out what I think I'm made of.</div>
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I need to explore the world around me, and while doing so, learn even more about myself.<br />
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So, on the agenda for me today?? Drink my ass some coffee, edit two photo sets, clean, and MAYBE dye my hair. I haven't decided on that one yet. I'm thinking about touching up my roots in the front and adding major amounts of pink (and maybe turquoise). What are YOU doing today?</div>
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Besos!</div>
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Aimee</div>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-28323758114157498802012-07-06T18:35:00.002-06:002012-07-06T18:56:23.905-06:00StepsSo, I'm taking steps to move. Finished my FAFSA (which I needed to do anyway), re-admitted to El Camino College in Torrence, CA... I'm talking to my niece and looking for jobs on Craigslist. I'm far from actually making this decision, but I feel like I'm doing something.<br />
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This whole situation I blogged about in my previous entry from earlier today is making me want to separate myself from everyone here. It's not my drama and it's drama I really don't want any part of. Ever. Period. <br />
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I don't like when negative shit pollutes my space.Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-3810596526123849612012-07-06T15:55:00.001-06:002012-07-06T15:57:21.959-06:00Life/Live UpdateI need to get back into blogging again. I used to be my release and with everything going on in my life (or rather around me), I need some sweet release!! I'll probably start doing vlogs on Youtube too. Something!<br />
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So, lately, there has been some drama going down in my personal life. Luckily, it doesn't directly involve me, however, it involves my sister-from-another-mister (whom my biological sister lives with) and my biological sister's best friend, who was also living in the same house temporarily. The reason this is my personal life is because my sister, who isn't really involved, is heavily involved... and all this drama revolves around huge amounts of shit talking, a drug-dealer boyfriend that no one really knows much about but has been in and out of said household on numerous occasions, supposedly large quantities of cash (supposedly mailed, rumored to be anywhere from $4000 to $12,000) that has gone missing... and is also speculated to not be cash, but in fact product (see drug dealer boyfriend).<br />
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What makes this even worse is that a 2 year old lives in this household.<br />
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So much sketchy shit and the more I think about it, the more uneasy I get, considering the circumstances. No one really knows what was in this missing package. There's a whole bunch of shit talking, cops were even involved last night. And with this package, if this much money (and/or possible drugs) has actually gone missing, that puts the lives of the people who own this house and live there full-time (my extended family and life-long friends, not to mention my own flesh-and-blood sister) at risk. Too much speculation and I really do hope it all gets settled. I really am happy that I am not directly involved with this, but it still makes me want to run away from all of it all together. Wash my hands clean.<br />
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With that being said, a move back to California has struck my brain patterns something throughout the day. I have this huge itch to change life up. Mostly the way it looks. I LOVE Colorado so much. I've toyed with the idea of moving back to Florida, but even that comes with its own set of dramas. I just want to start fresh somewhere. I don't know where yet. Hell, I don't even know how considering my financial situation not being the most conducive for moving, but I crave it.<br />
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I crave change. I crave a change in scenery. I crave surrounding myself with new people and new experiences. I miss my family in California, and my niece tells me at any point possible, that she misses me and wants me to come back.<br />
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And even California has its own set of dramas lol I'm willing to bet I'd be able to find a family member to live with. I would like to reconcile with my older sister out there, but at the same time, I'm totally ok with not. (That's a whole other blog update)<br />
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Anyway, that's a pretty good start for now. I'll be doing this more often. I used SuicideGirls to blog about my own personal life, but that was getting to be too much than I wanted. With it being a pay-site and me not knowing how long I'll be able to ride the whole gifted-membership thing, my time on there is limited. I'll probably convert my old blogs from there to here, so that I'll always have them...<br />
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hm... that's a good idea. Archival is a good idea!<br />
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Anyway, much love!<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-6810362239285687492011-08-03T17:23:00.001-06:002011-08-03T17:28:16.190-06:00So I haven't been blogging lately...Keeping up with this is hard for me. I have issues with doing things in a timely manner sometimes... at least when it's up to me. I have no problem staying on task for things that aren't for me or up to me.<br />
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Anyway, not a whole lot has really been news-worthy. I have been busy with <a href="http://www.landmarkeducation.com/">Landmark</a> stuff. I started a new assisting agreement surrounding the Causing the Miraculous seminar that started a week and a half ago and so far so good. There was a little glitch in the whole thing in regards with who was the Production Supervisor. Thought that was all handled and cleaned up after we left the first night and turned out it wasn't, at least for her. Came back this last Monday to find out she had quit. Totally surprised me, but part of me was not surprised because I know that the work that we do in Landmark is not how people usually handle their everyday lives. So when people are confronted with "being cause" in the matter of their lives, they associate that with taking the blame or being at fault. I'm struggling with wanting to blame myself for why she didn't come back. I said what I needed to say, took complete responsibility and she accepted, but the last thing I ever want is for anyone around me to feel disempowered in their lives for any reason, big or small.<br />
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So, yeah.<br />
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I've been volunteering a lot with <a href="http://www.lovehopestrength.org/">Love Hope Strength</a>, it seems. We were at the A Perfect Circle show at Red Rocks last night. Signed up 52 people to be on <a href="http://www.dkmsamericas.org/">the list</a> and made over $300 in merch sales to benefit our bone marrow drives. I love this organization and I can't wait to see how big we can all help grow it!<br />
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Found out they're actually opening up an office and they're trying to get <a href="http://www.hgtv.com/">HGTV</a> to come in and remodel the old dispensary they took over. I'm doing what I can to help spread the word and maybe we can get the HGTV experience to come to Denver once again.<br />
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Anywho, that's about all that's going on... so far.<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-24520336465062618142011-07-23T00:04:00.001-06:002011-07-23T00:05:45.431-06:00This is new...I find myself completely drawn into all things makeup and beauty. I've been addicted to the stuff for a very long time, I've just been really lazy to actually put it on my face on a daily basis. I spend hours upon hours of looking at makeup tutorials and huals and whatever on YouTube so I decided it's time I figure out a way to make a living by it... and to share what I know.<br />
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</div><div>I created a channel (I have yet to upload anything) and it'll feature whatever I feel like sharing. We'll see what I make of it.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Besos!</div><div>Aimee</div>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-45371640306355172482011-07-12T13:16:00.000-06:002011-07-12T13:16:21.723-06:00Now that that's over...So, as Myles said it, now that I've properly vented, no more talking about it again.<br />
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Just to update, Brent is not going to be here this week. Accidental cancelled reservations have foiled the plan so we are going to start talks on when it's going to actually happen. Now that I've cried it all out and gotten into communication with my community, it's time to move on and be excited for tonight.<br />
<br />
Tonight is the evening session of this weekend's Landmark Forum and I couldn't be happier! I was looking forward to Brent being here to be a part of it but I'm not letting that take away from the incredible-ness of this weekend and how powerful it was for me. There are things still needed to be done, like get to work on my project and meet and talk to people about how to create a non-profit. It may not be in time for the completion of my Self-Expression and Leadership Program, but I'm so committed to making a difference in my brother's life and the lives of those that are living with Autism that it's time I make that difference a reality.<br />
<br />
I've messaged a woman from my church to see if we can get together. Every time I think of putting together a project or event surround this non-profit, she always comes up for me. It's time we talk.<br />
<br />
There are a few other women I want to talk to and see what they have to offer... insights, suggestions, knowledge, interest, whatever! My life is about making a difference and I can't little bumps in the road get in my way. It's a dishonor and a disservice to myself and the world. I am so very clear about that.<br />
<br />
Infinite love,<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-55527090698129380002011-07-12T01:13:00.000-06:002011-07-12T01:13:35.091-06:00Alone with the "Idiot"You know that voice in the back of your head? Mine is running wild.<div><br /></div><div>So, there are issues with the original plans made for tomorrow and the rest of the week. I know it wasn't on purpose but his reservation was cancelled somehow and he's going to work on getting it back and the "idiot" (aka the voice in the back of my head) is telling me, "See! This is exactly why you should never plan things. Why you shouldn't announce things. Why you shouldn't get excited for anything because there's no point. You're not worth it. You never get what you want."</div><div><br /></div><div>I am clear that this voice isn't really ME but fuck, when I'm alone, I have no reinforcements to help me combat this thing and help me see reason.</div><div><br /></div><div>I had the most amazing and powerful weekend and I'm having issues with this stupid "idiot." I know it's never going to go away. I'm doing my best to tell it, "thank you for sharing but I have more important things to do."</div><div><br /></div><div>I cried it out on the phone with him, then let him go because I was really close to blaming him. And I sort of did, and that's something I have to clean up because it's not his fault that these thoughts take over. And I so wanted to blame him and tell him there's no point in talking anymore because this is always going to happen but my commitment to him is much more powerful than that because I said so.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, I had to get up and blog because I'll be damned if I'm going to let this stupid, fucking "idiot" take over. I'm more powerful than it, damnit.</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, thanks for listening.</div><div><br /></div><div>Besos!</div><div>Aimee</div>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-15014934295792180432011-07-11T01:58:00.001-06:002011-07-11T02:01:00.715-06:00Is this what they call enlightenment?So, I spent my weekend being of service to others and providing and generating a space for transformation to happen.<br />
<br />
Have you ever heard of the <a href="http://www.landmarkeducation.com/">Landmark Forum</a>? Maybe that's a good place to start. If not, just know that it is an incredibly powerful tool that is used to help people create lives they want and help them fulfill on what matters and is of importance to them. It is intense, but the reward is beyond words.<br />
<br />
What I got for myself this weekend, while being on sound and partnering with the Landmark Forum leaders by providing their voice for the Landmark Forum to happen, was that my whole heart is the world and the people in it. Who I am is absolutely everything. It may sound kind of hokey but I really got that I am nothing without this world I live in and the people in it... every single one of them. If you are reading this, this means you too. I want you to know that I love you from everything in my being. Everything I am and everything I say I am, and I promise to honor you by honoring myself.<br />
<br />
Anyway, I just had to say that. I don't want to ever lose it. And, from here on out, I am using my blog to get what I need out of my head so I can have the space to continually create my life for what's next and what's possible.<br />
<br />
I now get why <a href="http://pacingthepanicroom.blogspot.com/">The Panic Room</a> says at the end of every entry, "All the love in the universe," because that's so right there for me. And I so get it for myself. So, to borrow from him...<br />
<br />
With all the love of the universe,<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-43020697378129851682011-05-26T18:35:00.002-06:002011-05-26T18:36:39.980-06:00Letter to my Women's Ministry<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">Hello ladies.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br />
I want to apologize for not posting this sooner to those that might be interested. I've been worried about how to approach it because I'm really passionate about my project and I've been worried about sounding like an idiot. I've been worried that no one would want to help me and through small conversations with a few women at Pathways and in my other communities, I'm realizing how wrong I really am.<br />
<br />
Anyway, I'm currently in the Self Expression and Leadership Program at Landmark Education and what we're up to is transforming ourselves inside our communities so that we're related to as bigger than our circumstances. How we do that is through community projects that we create and using one of the communities that we're personally involved in. I chose the Women's Ministry at Pathways because of how much the church means to me. I've been a part of Pathways for 3 years now and I barely know anyone. I talk about how much Pathways means to myself and my life but I haven't involved myself and I'm looking to transform my participation in all areas of my life. <br />
<br />
My whole life, I've felt like an outsider looking in and not like because it's hard but because I've always felt like I wasn't worth it... a decision I made about myself when I was 3. Through Landmark, I know myself to be far beyond my circumstances and decisions I make about myself and others. Pathways has worked perfectly into this. Landmark brought me to God, and Pathways sustains and grows my relationship with Him and with the people around me. I do want to thank each and every one of you for providing a space that women (and people in general) can be themselves, deal with whatever they need to deal with and be accepted as part of our larger family with God.<br />
<br />
So, about my project...<br />
<br />
Background: I have a severely austisic brother. As a family, we don't have a lot of support as far as other families go. The people that are involved in my brother's care (doctors, teachers, therapists, psychiatrists, etc) don't communicate with each other. Everyone has a professional opinion and advice but no one is communicating with each other. <br />
<br />
For example, I'm heavily involved in my brother's care. I took him to a doctor's appointment when my mom couldn't (she was sick) and the doctor was surprised that my brother was off the two new drugs she had prescribed him. (Within hours of him taking them in conjunction with his current and on-going meds, his aggression and agitation skyrocketed resulting in him hitting classmates and teachers and getting suspended from school. My mom and school decided it was best to take him off both.) She told me I didn't know what I was talking about and that she had conversations with my mom AND school and they told her that the drugs were working.<br />
<br />
Fast forward to a few weeks later, my mom was able to get my brother in to see a child psychiatrist at Children's Hospital. (We're trying to get him into this intensive day program to help with his autism and behavioral issues.) The psychiatrist told my mom that we need to stop medicating him because of his behavior. It's not going to solve the problem (everything I've been saying all along).<br />
<br />
This is what's so frustrating. My brother is 13. For 13 years of his life, we've been trying to figure out what's best for him. How to get him the best care. If it wasn't for my mom finally getting the guts to get up and do something, finding the experts and going to the Department of Education because of the lack of help my mom's getting from the schools my brother has been in, my brother wouldn't be on the path to finally getting where he needs to be.<br />
<br />
This is where my project comes in...<br />
<br />
I want to create a network or some sort of non-profit, something where there is a place that families can go to (either physical or online) when they don't know where else to go. Maybe a liaison of some sort to make sure that all parties are communicating and are coordinated together to ensure the proper care of the child. I don't want to just narrow it down to children with autism. I want to bring it back to a time when your family doctor was involved with the lives of their patients. Growing up, my pediatrician was a family friend. He always made sure he knew what we were up to and that things outside of our healthcare were going well. To this day, he remembers me and my sister.<br />
<br />
I want to bring it back to "it takes a village to raise a child."<br />
<br />
As a kick off event, or even just an event to bring professionals and families together to mingle and get to know each other, I want to create a luncheon. Either formal or informal, where families are able to get to know professionals and ask questions and professionals are able to get to know the communities and families that they care for.<br />
<br />
I know this is long, but this was the best way I could think about getting this out there. I appreciate you reading this if you've made it this far. If you have any questions or want to get involved, please let me know. I would LOVE your help in getting this thing together because I don't know how I'll be able to do this one my own.<br />
<br />
Love, <br />
Aimee Whitehead<br />
<br />
Who I am is the possibility of love, communication, acceptance and empowerment.</span></span></div>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-88988785058569411842011-05-02T16:07:00.001-06:002011-05-02T16:08:57.478-06:00You know...I'd be better at this blogging thing if blogging were more like social networking, because, holy crap, am I addicted! <a href="http://www.twitter.com.silvercharmer/">Twitter</a> and <a href="http://www.facebook.com/aimee.whitehead">Facebook </a>get all my attention, really. Those and <a href="http://www.suicidegirls.com/members/silvercharmer">SG.</a><br />
<br />
Anyway, not a whole lot is really new. I was talking to an ex for a little bit. We're still friends but his girlfriend broke up with him and left him and I allowed that to get my hopes up.<br />
<br />
It's funny and a little sad how much I'll allow my hopes to get up just because a small opportunity seems to arise and how much I really am looking forward to not being single anymore. I'm secure in who I am and I am constantly getting to know myself better every day but I definitely look forward to the day when I partner up with someone and do life together in a committed and loving relationship.<br />
<br />
So, I haven't talked to him for about a week now and I think it's for the best. He needs to know what it's like to be by himself and to be single. He needs to get in touch with who he is and be comfortable until he jumps into another relationship and, unfortunately, if I were around him too much, I would want to give him comfort and give in if he showed wanting to get back together. The spark and attraction is still there but I need to stand my ground and continue to stand for what I want in life and he needs to get himself into a healthy place before he goes jumping into another relationship. I'm a firm believer in getting to know oneself and being comfortable with oneself before jumping into a relationship. Being single and being comfortable with being single is a HUGE requirement (at least for me) before committing to spend your life with someone... or even casually dating... because if you don't like yourself, how can you possible inflict yourself upon others. (I read that on Twitter a long time ago and it really resonated with me.)<br />
<br />
OK, I've said my piece.<br />
<br />
Time to get ready and make some possibilities happen!<br />
<br />
Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-85127618828146936682011-04-15T23:41:00.002-06:002011-04-15T23:42:11.765-06:00Day 2<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj9FQLnchZ766hsacCffvy134n4p_l1At_xGK6qS73a9Wh8Toco6veR6HXhy6Uf-CBvcnKRIiwmrfdzFUSUaMEyvNzHN-uMFVVzTISg7WvdsU4eGHQv2K8p9IqX2dftJW1MAXqMnnStTI/s1600/edit.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj9FQLnchZ766hsacCffvy134n4p_l1At_xGK6qS73a9Wh8Toco6veR6HXhy6Uf-CBvcnKRIiwmrfdzFUSUaMEyvNzHN-uMFVVzTISg7WvdsU4eGHQv2K8p9IqX2dftJW1MAXqMnnStTI/s320/edit.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>A picture of you and the person you've been closest with the longest.<br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 14px;">Me and my dad, June 2007. The only one I have of him and I when I'm an adult. I have always been a daddy's girl. His opinion matters the most to me. When something good happens, when I need some support and a someone to help me get my head on straight, I call him.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 14px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 14px;">He is the greatest man I have ever known.</span> </span>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-37943189232246348132011-04-15T13:07:00.000-06:002011-04-15T13:07:45.899-06:00YES!<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">So, tomorrow, I'm all set! Starting the Self-Expression and Leadership Program bright and early!</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I'm working today from 2 to 10 so a full day at work, which always goes well and faster than I would think, most of the time. Hope today is no exception.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Not doing the greatest with my diet but I have successfully avoided buying fast-food, so that's a plus. It's about time I start avoiding it all together and I'll start today by taking my lunch to work with me.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Next on the agenda will be to start working out again and buying a bathroom scale so I can keep track of my weight. I checked my checking account balance to find a charge that looked really familiar. Turns out I do still have a gym membership and it's about time I start using it again. I don't have time today, but my goal will be to get up early tomorrow before the first SELP classroom and workout. I miss the feeling of going to the gym regularly, the habit of it. Most importantly, I miss the days when, if I wasn't able to make it to the gym, my day was off. Time to make it routine again.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Anywho, that's about all that's going on with me. I think I'll start posting my 30 Day Picture Challenge that I started on FB here...</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Here's the challenge...</span><br />
<br />
<div class="clearfix fbPhotoInlineCaptionEditor" id="u203366_3" style="border-collapse: collapse; display: block; zoom: 1;"><div class="captionWrapper" style="margin-right: 18px;"><div class="fbPhotoCaption" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px;">Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.<br />
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest.<br />
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.<br />
Day 04 - A picture of your night.<br />
Day 05 - A picture of ......your favorite memory.<br />
Day 06 - A picture of somewhere you've been.<br />
Day 07 - A picture that shows your true self.<br />
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.<br />
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.<br />
Day 10 - A picture of someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future.<br />
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.<br />
Day 12 - A picture of something you love.<br />
Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.<br />
Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.<br />
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.<br />
Day 16 - A picture of you and your friends.<br />
Day 17 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.<br />
Day 18 - A picture of your favorite place.<br />
Day 19 - A picture of a habit you wish you didn't have.<br />
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.<br />
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.<br />
Day 22 - A picture that confuses you.<br />
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.<br />
Day 24 - A picture of something you crave a lot.<br />
Day 25 - A picture of you last year and how you've changed since then.<br />
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.<br />
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.<br />
Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of.<br />
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.<br />
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss.</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px;"><br />
</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">So, Day 1 - Post a picture of yourself with fifteen facts</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiL0E2dma55rbE1iyrLnSv2mHVcf2OMMLHsyFCf1UGIhi4YaTETGOw7XPHt3IRw10b-sQQ_kS3eMIz8noIOlWmd2RAsnoJiUTKoBcwuPyPHfDJyL4-47aaEvyETvTs8NFSSQxy3WgyEIY/s1600/DSC_0006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiL0E2dma55rbE1iyrLnSv2mHVcf2OMMLHsyFCf1UGIhi4YaTETGOw7XPHt3IRw10b-sQQ_kS3eMIz8noIOlWmd2RAsnoJiUTKoBcwuPyPHfDJyL4-47aaEvyETvTs8NFSSQxy3WgyEIY/s320/DSC_0006.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="fbPhotoCaption"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="fbPhotoCaption" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px;">1. I'm a HUGE Gator Fan. I bleed Orange and Blue. And because Tim Tebow is a Bronco QB, I'm a Broncos fan too. The day he leaves the team is the day I stop being a Bronco fan (most likely).<br />
2. I have two dogs (kind of) and two cats.<br />
3. I am eternally grateful and constantly inspired by my participation and assisting around various Landmark Education courses and the people I meet all the time.<br />
4. I have THE hardest time doing homework, or anything that I HAVE to do, like laundry or cleaning.<br />
5. I want to ride horses on a regular basis.<br />
6. I'm obsessed (slightly exaggerated term) with photography and cameras. Capturing moments in time and how things naturally occur inspire me.<br />
7. I am happily single and getting to know something about myself every day. I'm stronger than I realize and I don't give myself the credit very often.<br />
8. Taking compliments and appreciation from other people is very hard for me to be with, but I'm learning.<br />
9. I am totally lit up by providing something of benefit to other people.<br />
10. I think I'm slightly compulsive when it comes to spending money, but I'm learning to control my money and not letting my money control me. (Dave Ramsey FTW!)<br />
11. My dad is the greatest man I have ever known and I love him with all my heart and soul.<br />
12. I'm learning that I do deserve good things in life. That's going to be an every day process.<br />
13. I have a blog that I hardly ever use but I'm mustering the courage to actually use it for this great idea I have about transforming my body and exploring what it's like to go after my passions instead of letting fear stop me.<br />
14. I prefer life sober, but I like drinking every now and then. I enjoy the flavor of vodka tonics and Irish Carbombs.<br />
15. I LOVE BEARDS! And I would honestly rather marry a man that has at least the capability of growing a full-on beard.</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px;"><br />
</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption">Today is day 2 but I'll have to find the picture later when I get off of work.</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption"><br />
</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption">Besos!</div><div class="fbPhotoCaption">Aimee</div></div></div>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-54742543117416561982011-04-14T01:45:00.001-06:002011-04-14T01:51:22.406-06:00Terrible!I'm awful at keeping up to date with this. I think it mostly has to do with the fact that Blogger is not very interactive, like Twitter, FB and SG.<br />
<br />
So, just a little update from November... I am no longer apprenticing at Dark Millennia Tattoo. I left that place right before New Year's because it didn't matter that I was there and the guy that was teaching me was gone two weeks out of every month and I want someone that can actually teach me everything there is to know about piercing rather than trying to learn most of what I want to know on my own. I am very much someone that needs to feel like it's a partnership.<br />
<br />
So, I've been looking for a new apprenticeship half-assed but may pick that back up again more full-forced now that the semester is almost over.<br />
<br />
I am having huge issues with studying and doing homework. I've had this problem since the beginning of my school career (kindergarten) and I'm starting to think it has to be more than poor study habits. I've been doing a lot of thinking about that and if I have to resort to medication, I might do it because there are too many things I want to accomplish to allow myself to get in my own way. Maybe actually being inspired to do this blog regularly will be the kick in the ass I need to actually do it. I'm doing well in one of my classes but not very well in the other and will drop here before it's too late.<br />
<br />
You would thinking that paying-out-of-pocket would be enough motivation to do well, but it's not and I have to figure out why. I know it's all in my head but it's the most frustrating thing, to know how easy it actually is and that I just can't seem to fucking do it.<br />
<br />
The same goes with losing weight. I don't know how much I weigh right now but I know I'm at my heaviest. If I'm not, that would be a damn shock.<br />
<br />
Although... going a <i>little</i> off topic, I think I might have an insight as to why things seem to be hard for me to do...<br />
<br />
After last night at the completion of the Landmark Forum here in Denver this past weekend, I was talking to a guy I was assisting with around Advanced Course Registration about things that are important to me and things I want to create and generate around my finances and what I really want out of life (always the best conversations even if they're sometimes hard to handle at the time). At the end of the night when we had already completed and everyone was getting ready to head out, he came up to me to accknowledge me for how I am with people. It was hard to sit with because that's how it always has been for me when it comes to compliments and acknowledgement, but he had said something in particular to me that struck a chord... he said that I am considerate but I'm not very considerate to myself.<br />
<br />
So so very true. And more tears came with that realization that I'm not.<br />
<br />
And on the way home, I realized that I've never thought that I deserved things... good things. I brush of praise because I was "just doing my job" or "it was nothing." People compliment me for the way I look, the way I've dressed, or the things I contribute, and I have to change the subject quickly. I need help, emotionally, physically or financially, and I don't think it's important enough to trouble people for my petty concerns. I have to do things on my own because I don't want to have to be disappointed if someone else doesn't follow through or I fail and I let someone else down. Group projects are a nightmare for me because other people's grades are depending on me when I already know I have the hardest time doing school work outside of school. I don't deserve it and I have felt like I never have and never will.<br />
<br />
I remember the exact day I made that decision. My dad was leaving for Saudi Arabia. I was about 3, maybe. I was sitting behind the recliner in our living room (right upstairs) with my knees curled up to my face, sobbing because my dad was leaving (or already left, I can't remember) and no amount of begging or crying would get him to stay. I wasn't worth staying for.<br />
<br />
Fast forward to kindergarten. I was 5. My dad was home for good from Saudi Arabia but my parents were getting a divorce and my dad was moving out. I was begging and pleading for him to stay. I didn't want him to go anywhere, but he was leaving anyway. I wasn't worth staying for. I didn't deserve to have my dad around. The first "abandonment," I made the decision. The second was a confirmation. At 5 years old, I decided for the rest of my life that I didn't deserve to have the things I wanted.<br />
<br />
But I'm letting that go. I DO deserve to have the things I want. I deserve to succeed. I deserve to be smart. I deserve to be pretty. I deserve to be loved. I deserve to have the job I want. I deserve to be remembered. I deserve attention.<br />
<br />
This is going to be an on-going process. I've had 22 years of practicing why I don't deserve things, so this I'm going to have to take one day at a time, but I'm worth it.<br />
<br />
So, with that being said, I am taking back my life and my future and boldly going where I never thought I could have gone before.<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-66522476498657581592010-11-22T14:22:00.000-07:002010-11-22T14:22:05.727-07:00Torn<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">On vacation from school this week! SOOOO excited! And I'm not working at Ulta until Friday.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">I started a piercing apprenticeship at my friend's husband's shop and I'm there Tuesdays and Fridays and whatever days I want to come in. I thought about going in today but this is the first day in what feels like a while that I have NOTHING going on. The seminar I'm assisting in is on a break this week as well. I don't have church this Wednesday night, so really, I have nothing going on and it feels good! I do have an exam next Monday in Humanities along with a journal entry due but that's not hard at all. Just need to do some studying and start getting ready for my Biology finals the last week of classes.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">Seriously, life is so good! I had a small little emotional breakdown last night after church talking to my friend about the direction my life is going. I feel this intense pull to go back to Florida but I'm not sure if it's really a pull or my desire to be closer to my dad. I have these desires and dreams of what I want for my life but I'm a firm believer that not only do things happen for a reason, but I also believe God has a plan for every one of us. (Please refrain from arguing with me on this. We all have our own beliefs and ideas and this is mine.)</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">So, she advised me to pray about it, which I will. I definitely know what it's like to fly by the seat of my pants and just do things on a whim but it's never boded well for me, hence why so many moves from Florida to Colorado and back. Lack of stability growing up and all that. I don't want to go into things blindly and without knowing or feeling whether this or that place is where I'm supposed to be. I'm torn because I really do like my life here. I LOVE my friends, my job, everything that I have out here in Colorado but I want to be closer to my dad while I can. I mean, my dad's healthy and in no immediate danger of leaving this world but I want to spend the time I have with him while I have him here. I miss having a parent around that is loving and caring and that is always there for me when I need him. I live with my mom but she is far from the caring, motherly type...</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">Anyway, that's enough. I'm on the verge of tears thinking about it. It's funny because my sister is the same way. It's hard when you grow up with parents that you know to be a certain way and you take it for granted. After growing up with the father I have, I can't imagine my life without him.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">Besos!</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br style="text-align: left;" /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">Aimee</span>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-58424437817223430652010-11-06T22:09:00.000-06:002010-11-06T22:09:14.505-06:00Oh great!So, my account was reactivated for a year on SG and I've been posting on there. Nothing too terribly important though I have been posting my boobs on there. I even received another free year activation code for the site so I won't be going anywhere for at least two years now. Last year was a gifted year, this year, same from the same user, and next year. Kinda crazy but I guess they like me on there... or at least some.<br />
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So I'm watching Starship Troopers. It really isn't an awesome movie. Some parts are even really cheesy but I can't stop watching it. LoL<br />
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I'm starting a new seminar series at Landmark Education called Living Powerfully. I'm so excited! I've been out of the conversation about living a life of possibility so I'm so looking forward to being busy again and getting out of the world of "circumstances run my life."<br />
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I'll do my best to keep this blog up to date on what's going on. Whenever I'm heavily involved in Landmark, I sometimes have some really good stuff to say. We'll see as the seminar progresses. It starts Monday.<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-56751115746401633952010-10-29T19:01:00.000-06:002010-10-29T19:01:31.962-06:00Got my first scammer todaySo, I put an extra camera for sale on CL and someone offered me more money than I was asking and wanted me to send an invoice via Paypal. Well, turns out it was a scam. I called Customer Service and forwarded the emails to <a href="mailto:Spoof@paypal.com">Spoof@paypal.com</a>.<br />
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I'm so glad I investigate these things.<br />
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Babysitting was cancelled for tonight. A little bummed but I can get stuff done so all is well.<br />
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Decided it's finally time I do something about photography.<br />
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That's about it. Going to the halloween store to find some facial hair for tomorrow.<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-67949849163554289812010-10-27T14:23:00.000-06:002010-10-27T14:23:24.766-06:00Just a quick helloThen off to working-on-a-paper I go!<br />
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Sometimes I don't think I have a lot to say but yesterday, I had the urge to blog, mostly about my day. I have a lot to say about my daily life sometimes, hence why I'm always Tweeting. It's kind of ridiculous sometimes because I can't think that anyone wants to hear my random thoughts throughout the day. Just like with this blog, I have a whopping 1 follower. Ah well. I don't really do it for anyone other than me. It gives me an excuse to be online rather than on Facebook playing Farmville.<br />
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My cousin's wife (I guess cousin-in-law) accepted me on FB and I got to see recent pictures of my baby cousin. She's so beautiful! Because of friends and famiily out there, I want to attempt living in California again. As much as I miss Florida, (the heat, humidity, family, FOOTBALL, the Springs) I have this intense desire to try out California again, but under different circumstances. I'm torn as to whether to go there now or wait until I'm finished with school.<br />
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And with school, I'm on the fence about whether to stick it out at CCD (I LOVE the campus, where it's located, my Biology teacher and the diversity) but Red Rocks Community College is involved in this program... Scratch that last thought. Did some investigation. Turns out, CCD is a part of the WUE (Western Undergraduate Exchange) where I can go to one of 150 schools in 15 different states and get reduced-rate tuition. The top of my list: CSU - East Bay, Western Washington University, and University of Hawaii at Manoa. At least, those would be the ideal locations. We'll see. I still have some time to do some investigation.<br />
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That's about all that's going on. I just got off the phone not too long ago with my dad. He's sending me money to help for school expenses. This is the most I have ever needed his help and this is the closest I have ever been to what it's like to NOT have to be on my own. Meaning, I have friends and have heard of other people having their parents literally put them through college. I have had to do it on my own with a little help here and there from my parents. The sacrifices my dad is willing and able to make on behalf of his family is huge. He has, perhaps, saved me (or ruined me, depending on who is looking at it) from being with a man who is less than worthy. I have my dad to thank for my successes and my own idea of my self-worth.<br />
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Who has the greatest positive influence in your life? No need to answer, just something to think about.<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-8749772826946925092010-10-26T01:00:00.000-06:002010-10-26T01:00:02.290-06:00Well, I have no choice.Not really but kind of. My gift membership on SG has elapsed (I had no idea a year had already passed), so now that I want to blog, I must blog here. Not a bad deal though. Maybe this will get me into the habit of coming back here more often.<br />
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I'll miss SG though. I don't really know why considering I don't interact with a huge amount of people on there. Maybe it's the boobs.<br />
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Either way, I've been thinking a lot lately about my future. I'm in school and barely getting by and the thought of photography as a major has always had my attention to a certain degree. I have always wanted to get a science degree (I am a biology major) for quite a few reasons, top three being: 1.) that I love the reactions I get from people when I tell them what my major is, 2.) the flexibility of what having a general science degree entails (meaning I can do ANYTHING with it) and 3.) the fact that I can do anything with it... though I pretty much already included that with number 2.<br />
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But I'm starting to get to the point where not only do I want to increase my skill level at composing, capturing and producing visually and emotionally stimulating images but to eat, sleep, breath and live something completely creative, satisfying, emotionally taxing and just plain awesome. The lives of some of the photographers I've come across on the internet (I'll admit, I don't know very many professional photographers personally) is inspiring. I'm sure they may not feel the same way, but to me, someone who has always been surrounded by the analytical and intellectually rigorous, it is a beautiful life and I want to experience it first hand.<br />
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So, knowing I want to steer in that direction, I'm getting to the point of "do I do this now" or "do I wait until I'm finished with the first degree I already started." It's a hard decision, and I know either way I go, I'll end up in a place completely unrecognizable to where I am now. (Having wanderlust makes following through with tasks already in progress a little difficult.)<br />
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On a side note, I don't think I'm very mature. There are times where I think I've matured far beyond where I ever was, but sometimes I feel like I have progressed laterally and not in a forward motion. And sometimes, like today, I wonder if I really am as good as I think I am. Like I know I'll never have an unbiased opinion of myself but am I really as likeable as I think I am, or as great as I already think I am. But I digress.<br />
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Anyway, those are my random thoughts of the night. Just finished rewriting a "journal entry" for my Humanities class on The Odyssey. Good stuff. We didn't read the entire 24 books but since I own it, I think I might start from the beginning with The Illiad.<br />
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Hope whoever reads this, you have a great night!<br />
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Besos!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-41774152882287032272010-10-22T14:51:00.000-06:002010-10-22T14:51:05.737-06:00YupI've decided that when I feel inclined to blog, I need to redirect myself back to Blogger.<br />
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So, one of my managers called me this morning to see if I wanted to work 6 hours tonight. Is it bad that I refused because of the manager that's closing? I feel a little bad, and I do need the money but I can't stand this chick. She's awful to work with. It's really uncomfortable, but at the same time, I do love my job and my babysitting gig I do on Friday nights was cancelled. The mom went to Phoenix for the weekend and dad decided he wanted to say in and sleep. Awesome so I can do some stuff around the house but bummed because I don't feel like I have a real excuse to refuse hours at work.<br />
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Luckily, it's too late to call back and say I actually can. Mom's heading out to run errands so brother needs supervision.<br />
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Do you ever feel bad for refusing to do something for some reasons? I mean, I think I'm perfectly in my right to refuse. I wasn't scheduled, so I'm not obligated to go in. I could definitely use the hours, but then again, I do have things I need to do around the house, like clean, catch up on laundry, and I have major homework and studying to do this weekend.<br />
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Sometimes I dislike the fact that I always want to help. And I feel guilty when I can't, especially in this case because I know I can. Or could...<br />
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*sigh* I'll just shrug my shoulders off and get done what I need to get done for me.<br />
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Besos!<br />
Happy Friday!<br />
AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-81817213060004177402010-06-28T11:22:00.002-06:002010-06-28T11:27:45.756-06:00There I go...Not logging on in a while.<br /><br />I haven't been on a computer much at all. And when I am, it's enough time to check Facebook and a few other things, but I'm not spending hours on end online anymore. Thank God for my Blackberry because I wouldn't know what was going on outside my little world.<br /><br />I've been spending a lot of time alone lately. It tends to happen when all your friends and family have their own stuff going on. I have been getting a little emotional and jealous about this but I'm starting to get over it and back into that inner peace of knowing, loving, and just being with myself. It's almost scary how I've only been out of it for a few months and going back into it is so hard and emotionally trying.<br /><br />But eh, it is to happen. Like that saying goes, "The most important relationship one will ever have is with the self." Or that is the saying as I remember it. I don't even remember where it came from but I know it's in one of my statuses on Facebook.<br /><br />Anywho, that's really all for now. Must get ready for work now.<br /><br />Muchos Besos!<br />AimeeAimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-551516943262710844.post-5903890874545755942010-05-29T15:38:00.000-06:002010-05-29T15:38:45.168-06:00Well...<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Helvetica, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; color: rgb(34, 34, 34); line-height: 19px; "><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 8px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 8px; padding-left: 0px; ">My phone wasn't there. After getting over the initial shock and disappointment, it's kind of peaceful not having a phone, but I am going to go ahead and file an insurance claim on it. I miss not being able to take pictures of things that catch my attention... and Tweeting. I'm ridiculously addicted to it. AND, this morning I was on the couch enjoying the house to myself and I needed the library phone number, but I couldn't Google it from my phone. I miss the convenience of it.</p><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 8px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 8px; padding-left: 0px; ">I have been thinking, dreaming and scheming of (hopefully) lucrative home-based businesses for myself, including my photography. The idea is so stirring to my blood...</p><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 8px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 8px; padding-left: 0px; ">Anywho, time to get ready for my princess shift at work.</p><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 8px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 8px; padding-left: 0px; ">Muchos besos!</p><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 8px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 8px; padding-left: 0px; ">Aimee </p></span>Aimee Elisehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13517764484599360572noreply@blogger.com0